Scene 1 and all continuity scenes
A teacher and her class begin a heated debate about whether they should be allowed to extend their time at primary school, or whether they should accept that it’s time to leave and move on. (song – Prexit) Both sides recall some hilarious experiences to prove their point and we, the audience, through the following snapshots of life in and out of the classroom, get to share and re-live the best bits of our time before secondary school beckoned.
First, we remember just how indispensable our teaching assistants are, as a hapless teacher struggles to make a confused class understand some simple maths! In a hilarious bit of role reversal we find out who really wears the trousers (or should that be latex gloves) in the classroom! (song – Hey! T.A.)
Who remembers the first time they were allowed to attend an after-school club? The promise of something exciting and out of the ordinary! For the group of children in this scene, perhaps the reality might not quite live up to the expectation!
(song – Football, Netball, Drama, Dance)
Primary school is full of unsung heroes, not least our devoted premises officers. In this scene we join school caretaker, Sam Handy, and his skilled gang, as they consider the long and bizarre list of maintenance jobs that working in a primary school throws up. (song – Mr Handy)
It’s a problem that never seems to go away, in spite of all the potions, lotions and combing that parents frantically employ…..NITS! Will leaving primary school mean an end to the scratching? (song – The Nits Blues)
An outdoor PE session in the wind and rain, when dressed only in flimsy vests and shorts, is not something children relish. How fantastic it is when teachers are willing to show a bit of solidarity and lead by example, joining them for a couple of laps of the field. (song – PE Nightmare)
Being sent to the head – something that strikes fear into the heart of every little person! What horrors lie in wait behind the door for these children who have been sent from the classroom in disgrace? (song – I’ve Been Sent To The Head)
Nothing sums up primary school more than the summer fete. What’s not to love about it? Well, plenty, especially if you’re the one in charge of running the show! (song – Splat The Rat’)
In an emotional final scene, the debaters accept that the memories they have made are things to treasure forever. However, in order to grow and blossom, we need to embrace change and move forward, even though a small part of our heart will always belong in primary school. (song – The Time I’ve Spent With You)
53 Speaking parts in order of appearance
*Click on the Line count/Costumes tab for more details
Note: if you have a smaller cast, because some characters only appear in one scene, multiple parts can be played by single actors. Alternatively, for bigger cast numbers, many of the larger speaking parts have enough lines to be shared out between any extra characters you want to include.
Scenes 1, 9 and all continuity scenes
Mr Harris – teacher
Mrs Cooper – teaching assistant
Miss Archer, Mr Chowdhry & Mrs Baker – teachers
Sam Handy – superhero premises officer
Chippy, Sparky, Bricky & Pipes – the DIY team
Scene 5 – No speaking characters in this scene
Mrs Ramsey – teacher
St John’s Ambulance Representative
Ensemble characters for featured songs and scenes
The nit-comb chorus
Summer fete-goers, stallholders and Morris dancers
What do you get?
This musical production is available to buy in 3 different formats. When ordering, simply choose the option (details below) which best suits your requirements.
- Option 1 – Book & Audio CD.
A wire-bound book containing the full script with detailed stage directions, character information, tips and suggestions for costumes, props and scenery, and a piano score for all songs. An audio CD of all songs (backing tracks & vocal tracks) plus continuity/incidental music and sound effects where required.
- Option 2 – CD-ROM & Audio CD.
A CD-ROM containing both a PDF and an editable MS Word document of the full script, with detailed stage directions, character information, tips and suggestions for costumes, props and scenery, and a PDF of the piano score for all songs. An audio CD of all songs (backing tracks & vocal tracks) plus continuity/incidental music and sound effects where required.
- Option 3 – Digital download.
All the PDF and MS Word files from Option 2 above, all audio tracks as MP3 files, plus JPEG files of cover artwork for use in making posters or other promotional material. Upon completion of your order, a link will be automatically sent to the email address you provided, from which all the files can be downloaded.
Any order containing a digital download option must be paid for online at the point of ordering. Any order containing a digital download which is not accompanied by payment will not be processed.
UK schools can order Book & Audio CD and CD-ROM & Audio CD options with an invoice to be paid within 30 days. Non-UK schools and private individuals (not ordering on behalf of a school) are required to pay for these at the point of ordering.